Tuesday, June 28, 2005


People were amazed by the head growing on the apple tree. It always tried to engage the orchard workers in conversation. "Nice apple crop we're having this year," it'd say, to the bewilderment of the listener. "Try the red delicious from the top branch. They're the juiciest." The head offered to tell the story of Adam and Eve, from the point of view of the apple. In its spare time it rattled off long term fruit futures, and was quite willing to share the secret of how to make an apple pie that could get the devil to give back souls. There were, however, instances of hostility. Anyone walking by the tree eating grapes or a banana was liable to be doused with hot dripping apple sauce.

Story #245

11 comments:

Rhoda IV said...

I found you on B.O.B. your blog is incredible and very creative. I used to go to cemataries and create detailed backstories for the deceased whose headstones had caught my eye.

atomicvelvetsigh said...

haa.. ok, that almost made me fall off my seat! totally funny...

Indeterminacy said...

Comadose: That is so cool! I was always obsessed with cemetaries and taking pictures there. I only did it once, though, on a rainy Endicott afternoon. One thing I noticed at the German cemetaries is that in marriages a hundred years ago and earlier, the man was usually ten to twenty years the senior of the woman. And the woman survived him by at least thirty years.

Atomicvelvetsigh: What do you mean almost? I'll have to try much harder next time. ;-) Guess it's funnier to get hit in the face with an apple pie than to have apple sauce dipped all over you.

Michael said...

You are the apple of my eye. What a nice story.

Take Care
Michael

Tom & Icy said...

That really was a funny ending. Very subtle with a swift flow. Enjoyable.

The Mushroom said...

Too bad one can't tell where the photo was taken... I betcha it was somewhere local to where I was born or where I grew up. I think I met that girl -- or that would explain why I had apple sauce on the back of my head that time after commenting about a grown woman having a bust like little green apples.

(Comadose: I do that too, and have some headstone photos up on Photo.net: des pieres tombales - see my bio for my best caption.)

fluff said...

after the first sentence it was hard to go on reading with laughter. I loved it.

a little group of cemetary fans here? :)

weirsdo said...

She cooked, too!

The Hobbesywood Times has an update on your love life.

LiVEwiRe said...

lol... I got a good giggle here. You make me laugh!!!

stevie.be. said...

i didnt know apples wore sunglasses

Indeterminacy said...

Stevieb: Ohmigod! I hope this doesn't offend the California Raisins!