Tuesday, June 14, 2005


It was love at first sight when the demoness came to my door, crying softly to herself. There was no way in heaven I could resist. The urge to take care of her overwhelmed my otherwise casual mentality, wherever seduction is concerned.

The Devil had put her to work tempting males into the evils of fornication and self-manipulation. One way or the other, she usually got her man. But she was sick of it and she wanted out.

"I want out!" her thin thread of a voice hooked into me, as powerful and holy as the cable holding up a church bell.

I promised to do everything to get her out of the clutches of Satan, whom she referred to as the Pimp from Hell. Upon hearing my stand, her face lit up, tightening that hold she had on me like a pleasurable vise. And I don't mean vice! There were no evil or lustful feelings between us, and I was sure that none would develop.

I lay her down on my bed, stroking her gently to calm her down, because she was tense with the fear of Satan's wrath. I began fiddling with the horns on her crown, until they were loose enough to slide off and toss away. I told her of all the things we could do together, how I'd take her to church, and read the Bible to her, and the late nights watching gospel TV. Her emotions must have been as turbulent as mine, for I felt her arms enclose around me, and noticed that her lips were about to press against mine. But before they could, the door bell sounded, causing both of us to jump. I went to see who it was. The Jehovah's Witnesses had come calling. Two of them.

This was a Godsend! I told them the situation and urged them to come inside and help. At the very least, they could offer her refuge in their temple. But my enthusiasm somehow unsettled them, and they backed away nervously. I implored them one last time to help me with the demoness, but then they bolted off, scattering half their pamphlets in the process. When I returned to the bedroom, my demoness was gone. But I thought of her that night as I touched myself.

Story #236

If this story has led you into temptation, there are now two paths you may take: one is dirty and the other is clean.

26 comments:

Tan Lucy Pez said...

HooBoy. It's hot in here.
Good story.

A Little Bar of Soap said...

Friends, the choice is yours:

Pr 4:14 Enter not into the path of the wicked, and go not in the way of evil men.
Pr 4:15 Avoid it, pass not by it, turn from it, and pass away.
Pr 4:16 For they sleep not, except they have done mischief; and their sleep is taken away, unless they cause some to fall.
Pr 4:17 For they eat the bread of wickedness, and drink the wine of violence.
Pr 4:18 But the path of the just is as the shining light, that shineth more and more unto the perfect day.

Doug said...

Good story. I can only offer a caption:

A costume hides only the false face.

To the little bar of soap:

"Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow"-Ps. 51:7, NKJV

The Mushroom said...

Lead me not into temptation, for I can find it myself. :)

Good story, and I think the truth is... the boys weren't running from her, the J's Witlesses ran off with your girlfriend. Or vice versa. Better than committing the sin of Onan as you have done, perhaps. :)

The Alien Guy said...

That was a really intertaining story and quite arousing. It's gets lonely out here. I liked that one!

The Devil said...

I liked it, too. That is my kind of reading!

icy said...

I don't get it.

The Lazy Iguana said...

I have a photo that would make for some funny stories. It can be found on my blog.

Skarr said...

Imaginative story.. kinda of twists the usual good person tempted by evil tale into evil person seeking some sort of redemption....

Although I liked the story, I think life's a little more complicated than good and evil, as the Church would have you believe.

Most of today's religions are designed for simple minds and if you look at history, these concepts were designed to convince people 2,000 years ago as a Roman emperor tried to feebly hold his people together by ousting all pagan religions and coming up with a fantasy story about God and making it simple.

Simple ideas for simple minds worked for a while and when it didn't, other means of persuasion were devised like blasphemy, inventing hellish places that your soul will linger in and so on...

Kelly Kell said...

Very Funny Indie! I think those horns she left behind could double as a sex toy! ;)

Indeterminacy said...

Lucy: Hope the story didn't make you sweat.

Soap: I think you like me now. You're not calling me evil or filthy, but just plain naughty.

Doug: The story seemed to me just right for this picture.

Mushroom: I know you, you just like the girl. She's pretty enough to make any story look good. ;-)

Alien Guy: Watch out, you know what happened when you're other bodily functions went out of control in your ship.

Devil: It's not easy to please the Devil and the angels in one go. Does this mean I'll get special treatment when I'm down there?

Icy: You don't have opposable thumbs. You have to get it the old fashioned way.

Lazy Inguana: I'll write you a story, but that photo is kind of not very aesthetic. I have to think that people might be eating or making love while reading my blog.

Skarr: You're right about that limitation of the story. This simplification of right and wrong would be my own criticism of the story, I don't think you will find that in anything else I've written, and I also believe this black and white way of thinking, moral absolutism, causes us more harm than good. For the record, I think fornication and self-manipulation are great.

Kelly Kell: Oh dear. ;-)

Jamie Dawn said...

Thanks for the link to A Little Bar of Soap. It is such a funny site.
I posted my response to your tag.

weirsdo said...

I knew she was still bad as soon as I read that gospel TV line.

weirsdo said...

P. S. I was just reading your comments on Alien Guy's blog. I like Thurber. There is a nice little book I think he wrote with E. B. White, IS SEX NECESSARY? But check out S. J. Perelman, too, if you haven't already.

Indeterminacy said...

Jamie: I saw your book list. Some good tips there. I'll comment on it later.

Weirsdo: You seem to have amazing insights in realm of seduction. ;-)
I have the Modern Library anthology of Thurber, which has a selection of chapters from "Is Sex Necessary". I'm still looking for the original book.

Helen said...

Thanks for the thought and congrats.
:)
Peace...............

Pikkel Weezel said...

Yea ,she looks good and all, but how good does she suck cock? Thats the information I'm looking for.

Indeterminacy said...

Pikkel Weezel: Perhaps my trilogy described and linked at Askthedevil will, uh, satisfy you.

Indeterminacy said...

Sorry everybody, I just didn't have time to get a story ready for today. But I hope to have one ready for tomorrow.

Alice: In Wonderland or Not said...

Nice.
I've never been here before.
I think I shall return.

A Little Bar of Soap said...

Indeterminacy: You are still both filthy and evil.

Jamie Dawn: There is nothing watsoever funny about my blog.

fluff said...

I enjoy this wicked sense of humour you're doing with a straight face, Mr. Indeterminacy. thanks for the laughther!

Eric said...

excellent blog, excellent picture, excellent story.

Tom & Icy said...

I still don't understand why when a human says 'It ain't funny' then everyone starts laughing.

sniff said...

I think she tricked you. The Devil can be tricky you know. I know because he tricked me into reading this story. Just remember "always wear underwear".

Very excellent story indeed.

sniffy...

Indeterminacy said...

Alice: You're always welcome to pop in here through the looking glass. Thanks for your nice comment.

Little Bar of Soap: No I'm not. Yes there is.

Ariel: Thanks for saying that. Maybe it's because I'm a big fan of (stonefaced) Buster Keaton.

Eric: It's hard to go wrong with a picture like this one. ;-) Thanks for the compliments.

Tom & Icy: People always do the opposite of what they're told to do.

Sniff: Fool me twice, would also be ok.