Thursday, September 22, 2005


Bad breakups, sudden inexplicable psychoses, menstruation. One out of ten men have extreme difficulty coping with these phenomena of the female gender. They are gripped by a sudden debilitating condition known as femiphobia. To them a day at the beach sunning among bikinied beauties with bare skin and semi-exposed breasts is worse than a nightmare of pursuit by knife-wielding nurses at a castration clinic. What can you do to help? If you're a girl: walk up to him, softly caress his cheek, take his hand, wrap your arms around him, search for his lips with yours and plant a gentle kiss on them. After a few repetitions the fear will have magically vanished. If you're a guy: walk up to him, softly caress his cheek, and so on. After a few repetitions there will be no more fears...

Story #283
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14 comments:

  1. Anonymous8:36 AM, September 22, 2005

    You really think so ?!!

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  2. Anonymous8:39 AM, September 22, 2005

    Good one, Indie. Very funny photo, too.
    I have a new site I'm linking this to.

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  3. Indeterminacy8:42 AM, September 22, 2005

    Rust: To be honest, I don't know. But how many of us have really had the experience?

    Mrs. Weirsdo: What? Another new site? I already linked to one new site of yours this week! Glad you liked the story.

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  4. Doug The Una11:25 AM, September 22, 2005

    My first response to your second sentence was "so now 90% of us are gay?"

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  5. Indeterminacy11:29 AM, September 22, 2005

    Doug: The question is: What was your second response to the first sentence!

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  6. LiVEwiRe11:49 AM, September 22, 2005

    Hmmm. I had a girl just lean over and kiss me as I was walking through a bar. I will say that it shook every other thought from my head at the time... even the grumpy crabby ones. You may be onto something here. Can I say that you've given me permission to go out and kiss all the guys? Please? =)

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  7. Indeterminacy12:05 PM, September 22, 2005

    Livewire: Go for it! But give me about five hours head start to get to where you are ;-)

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  8. dddragon2:15 PM, September 22, 2005

    Now, see, when I saw that pic the first thing that popped into my head was an old commercial line: "Does she or doesn't she? Only her hairdresser knows for sure."

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  9. A Little Bar of Soap5:13 PM, September 22, 2005

    *faints*

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  10. Indeterminacy5:16 PM, September 22, 2005

    Little Bar! I warned you not to read today's story. Buit I am glad I inspired you to say something besides, "Devil, get thee out!" I promise not to take any liberties while you're fainted.

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  11. The Mushroom9:35 PM, September 22, 2005

    In which case, I'll see what's in Little Bar's pockets. [rummaging] Two pennies, John Birch membership card, used fruit-flavored condom, multicolored lint, cocktail napkin with a phone number, one linty cherry Sucret, Cross In My Pocket card, half a shoestring.

    Thanks for the story, Indie...
    You don't have to live with Femiphobia. Call the number below, visit www.femiphobia.com, or see your doctor for more information.

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  12. Lila9:40 PM, September 22, 2005

    Fun story and picture.

    I think the fellow in the picture needs a t-shirt that says, "Sorry, girls, I'm gay!"

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  13. shtikl5:50 AM, September 23, 2005

    the world needs more love for sure!!! Indie, you are a prophet.

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  14. The Mushroom5:56 PM, September 23, 2005

    AP3 The shirt in question says: "Let's get one thing straight -- I'm not."

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